Sunday, June 17, 2012


My mom is still in the hospital. She is still waiting for her fistula to heal. From the sound of things, it's almost healed. I miss my mom. An hour every day in a hospital room is just not the same as having your mom around. It makes me sad to see her so discouraged and to see her wasting away to skin and bones because she hasn't been eating real food for the past 6 weeks. It really really bothers me. I'm hoping she will be released soon.

Maizey spent the whole day with her daddy and her papa today. I missed her so much all day. Sometimes it's hard to believe she's mine! She just brings so much happiness and love and laughter. I sometimes contemplate having another child. I would really like to but I worry about taking away from Maizey.
I mean, I cried for days after she was born for the dogs because now they would have to share the attention. (I blame PPD for most of it) but will I go through that with Maizey. I watched my nephews heart break with jealousy the first time my sister in law picked maizey up and again, cried for days that he had to feel that way. Will I ever be able to stand it to see Mai hurt like that no matter how brief?
On the other hand, she loves being around other kids. Cousins , friends kids, the ghetto neighbours who are like 16 years old. She always wants to be around them. Maybe she would embrace a sibling.
I'm getting pretty excited about the upcoming cottage trip! We're all hoping it will be an annual event. I just love the idea of Mai growing up with such nice traditions.
My doctor has made a referral to an ophthalmologist for maizey as her left eye tends to turn out still. I have actually been noticing it more frequently lately. I'd really like to get that fixed ASAP.

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Stacey said...

Having another doesn't really take away from your first. Honestly, it gives your first more. There is something so wonderful about having a sibling, sharing your life and parents with that sibling. And jealousy is just an adjustment. You can still have special one on one time with each kid. It really isn't hard. You can do it. :)

Sorry about your mom. :(

meridith said...

I'm so glad to hear your mom is nearing the end of this recovery. I'm sure it will be a relief to have her healed. On the sibling note, I'm the oldest of two and I really think it depends heavily on the personalities of the kids and the parent/s. Having sisters was about 30% enriching and 70% really difficult. If given the choice, I'd have chosen to be an only child. My best counsel is to look to your own family dynamic and see if you will have an environment like Stacey mentions. I wish it were just a given!